The Mercenary Chef From Class A
by Bunpoushihou
Summary: Formerly a hired hand to avenge students who suffered under the evil hands of Karma and now a friend of said target and his friend, Arai Kuma Koon finds herself taking a new job in the last year of school fun. What is this 'biological robotic creation of science and modern technology' that she must help students destroy in a 'PE exercise?
1. The Wasabi Job

"Mou, you should clean up your apartment more, Karma-kun. You'll suffocate yourself in dust~"

The redhead didn't even need to glance over to the door to see the blue-haired girl enter; gloves already stretched across her hand ready to purge his home of dust and junk. A grin did widen on his face as he continued watching the American movie though,

"There's no need to when I have a little coon always doing it for me, Arai-chan. Besides, where's the dust going to be when you wash the place up twice every week without even asking me?"

Blue darker than Nagisa's covered his vision for a moment as she scolded, "Dust accumulates everywhere until it becomes mountains, Karma-kun. Be more responsible and stay healthy — I bet this mess around here is the reason why your brain's so corrupted. And I heard you got suspended again."

"Yeah, perhaps." He nonchalantly, noncommittally said, moving his head to the side to continue staring at the moving pictures with golden eyes. Her wide purple ribbon tying that long silky hair that reached her knees even when tied high fluttered as she pouted with a Pocky stick in her mouth before she walked across the room to the closet for the cleaning supplies that his mother constantly sent him. He never had to use it with her around though.

Once the movie was over, he didn't even have to look around to feel the sparkles around him as everything glowed fresh and clean. The girl already left after fixing a quick meal of yakisoba for him in the kitchen.

As always, Arai Koon was a neat freak.

He didn't mind though. Hey, free food and finished chores.

…

"Ah," A girl stopped before waving, "Oiii, Nagisa-kun~!"

The boy with sky blue hair and eyes infinitely lighter than her own midnight blue locks and eyes jolted; hands accidentally released the joystick, causing the ball to drop from the two prong claw. He tearily gazed back at her in mild depression,

"Hey… Arai-chan…" The girl stared blankly before flusteredly waving her hands,

"Oh geez! Did I disturb you? I'm so sorry!" Taking out her wallet, she gave him enough for more arcade coins, "Here."

The boy waved his hands, "Ah, no, it's alright. I was going to drop it anyways—" He sheepishly confessed, "Actually, I already spent about a thousand yen on this claw machine. I guess it's a sign to quit."

She stared incredulously at the boy before glancing though the glass to see a limited edition DVD on display. A small laugh escaped her as she recognized the director, "You and Karma-kun both — just yesterday, he was watching another American movie by the same director~" Nodding her head in decisive mirth, she walked into the arcade center, "Wait here" and came back with tokens of her own, pushing in four and biting into another Pocky stick. Nagisa gazed at the cloth bag around her left elbow — which as always contained a multitude of sweets within. A majority of them were her favorite Pocky. Arai always ate sweets, probably making every girl jealous with her still lithe hourglass figure.

"Are you sure? I think it's impossible with just two prongs, probably even three." Especially because the target was small, spherical, and plastic. Still, Nagisa really wanted that limited edition DVD prize that contained extra scenes and bloopers not found in theaters. Plus, the DVD hadn't even come out yet in stores though it ran in the theaters just recently. His hands ached for the goal which was probably why he didn't really try convincing her away.

Besides, he knew that she had good hand-eye coordination. She and Karma were both geniuses and overall laidback about the world with their great intelligence and physical abilities. Though she did try harder than that lazy Karma to get to where she was. Like how she earned her skinny figure through the daily runs in the nearby mountainous forests with her pet dog, a German Shepherd named Inuou.

A playful grin lit her lips as she crunched confidently on the Pocky, shuffling into a lower stance as the music started and lights blared on. Her dark eyes narrowed in focus and excitement as she moved the crane, speaking all the while, "The trick with these babies and everything is that they all have a weakness — you just have to look for it." The dark eyes glinted brightly as she pressed the button, watching as the claw swoop down in a painfully long movement before she moved the joystick to the side, slowly and gently, depositing it into the hole, from where the ball came out of. She tossed it to the awed boy, grinning largely, "See? Can you feel it? The dents perfect for grabbing? Those are the dents of a thousand players, Nagisa-kun, and you're the first winner! Congrats~!"

His own eyes glowed as he felt them, gazing down at the seemingly smooth ball to see shades of green in the rays of light. They were the imperfect shades — the bruises from its long history of use.

Observation and analysis was the key to all victory.

He smiled, beaming at the DVD that was soon to be his and then at his friend, "Thanks, Arai-chan!" This time, it was he who left to run inside for an exchange, shouting excitedly, "Wait here! Let's go to Karma-kun's house to watch it on the big screen! I'm sure you'll love it! It's a great movie!"

"Yeah!" She shouted back while grabbing a chocolate bar from her bag to chew all the while. Idly, Arai wondered how many new friends the boy made now that he was in Class E.

Not like she cared though — cared of the Class E status he now bore, of course. Classes never changed a person's identity. They were just boring things taught by boring teachers who did it for a living. Then again, she was probably biased with the only teachers she knew in Kunugigaoka Junior High for the past two years; the five being their two Class D teachers and her three Class A teachers.

She'd love to see a teacher that actually taught something worth learning.

…

"Boss! We ran out of confectionary sugar!"

"Again?" A deep, hearty voice answered, a fat man appearing in the back kitchen to frown at the empty bags. He wore a la torque hat along with a white pastry chef uniform like her's except she prefered the head wrap bandana for hair coverage. He then chuckled at the sight of the cakes all ready for packaging and selling, "Good, good — this shows that we have good business, running out so fast~" He patted her on her hat, "As always your pastries and desserts are so popular, Koon~!"

She blushed mildly at the praise, but gazed at the incomplete batter. He grinned, promising, "I'll send Sakaki out on a quick trip right away for now and then later order specially in bulk. For now, you can help Charle and Chane run the cashiers; it's getting busier out there~"

"Thanks, Boss!" Nodding at her new instructions, she washed her hands to help man a cashier on the frontier of rush hour war. She passed two more kitchens before finally reaching the door leading to the front counter of the big bakery that sold handmade candies to chocolates to breads, pastries, and cakes! There were still more types of sweets that they sold, even gelatins and gelatos — really anything that could be counted as a baked good or a sweet. Their bakery's name was quite famous in the nation as they even offered mail orders and online purchasing. They were Chiffon and she was really lucky that the Boss generously took her in as an apprentice and part time worker already almost two years ago.

"Ah, Koon-chan~!" The twin girls beamed in relief at the help that came from the back. They worked quicker with the same enthusiasm as always as they helped customers.

"Charle-chan, Chane-chan~" She replied in turn as she turned the money machine on, taking the next person in line. To her surprise, he was tall — unnaturally figured with his seemingly lack of joints and distinctly yellow skin. Not to mention that fake nostril on his face…

Still, she wasn't one to judge customers as she counted the cheap breads and sweets bought with her own enthusiastic smile. All in a day's work.

…

"Arai-chan!"

"Hm?"

She gazed up in surprise at the voice that entered her kitchen. Then again, she shouldn't really be surprised. The only reason why she had the furthermost back kitchen was because of it being closest to the backdoor where some three people were trusted and allowed to visit her even while she was working. Karma and Nagisa were two of the three, coming once in a while for fun (and to eat freebies) or to invite her for somethings that was 'urgent'; her cell phone laid in an isolated corner with her bags away from the food.

Boss was really too kind to trust and allow three strangers into his bakery — especially that good for nothing Karma.

The boy, Nagisa, panted, grinning as he looked up, "Can I ask you something?"

"...pfft." She laughed away as she continued decorating cakes with the theme of spring, "Isn't that something already?" He sheepishly blushed while she nodded, "Well, of course — go ahead and shoot; your Class E teacher didn't teach you a lesson right or something?"

"Ah, yeah…" Her eyes flickered to the side to see his sweatdrop, obviously remembering something out of the ordinary, "Something like that." His eyes beamed though, "Anyways, Arai-chan's brother was in the army, right?" He started, not even waiting for her confirmation as he shouted, "What's the best way to hold and use a knife and gun?!"

"..." Her brow arched ever the higher. Not only was that a weird question… To think that such a question would come from Nagisa of all people. He wasn't even interested in fighting or physical activities like Karma and her would be. The boy must have realized it as well as he was suddenly able to rethink his question, probably having dashed here right away when the thought to question her came. He waved his arms hurriedly,

"I mean — I, I—"

She sighed, deciding to leave Nagisa to his own devices. After all, there must be a reason why he didn't want to tell her. There was always a reason for each of the many secrets people didn't want to admit. And it wasn't as if innocent Nagisa was going to kill someone like Karma could and would. Yeah… There was no possibility of that. Her lips curled as she held her kitchen knife, fancily twirling it in the air before slicing the strawberries and other fruits for her cakes. Nagisa imitated a fish in awe as she spoke,

"Of course, while cooking and self-defense both use a knife, there's different ways to get a grip fitting each. For example…" Giving him an excuse to use against her for learning more, she continued talking while working, watching as Nagisa took notes and even a knife to practice under her observant eyes. The gun was more troublesome to teach (she disliked all loud noises and metallic smells) and she really wondered why he even thought of using one with how harmless he seemed to be. Then again, you couldn't judge all books by their covers. Having already began and finished other goods while she talked, she wrapped up the conversation and macaroons together, "Finally, just remember that if you ever do need to use a gun, then do use a silencer. Those things are loud and I don't want you to break your or my eardrums."

"Haai," He stopped his note taking as well with a quick stroke of his mechanical pencil, "Thanks, Arai-chan!"

She teasingly called out before he left, "Before you can even think about using a knife or a gun though, you should first train yourself. If you're too slow, then anyone could just dodge your blows or knock you out~!"

To her surprise, he just murmured something about everyone being too slow in front of some guy as he left deep in thought and reviewing the notebook.

…

"Arai-chan," She gazed at the black haired student with a big nose as he bashfully asked, "Can we talk in English again? For practice?"

Seo Tomoya was the English talent of the Five Virtuosos in Class A. They had met by chance in Los Angeles, California once; he had been there for a year because of his parent's work and she had been there for a week, visiting her brother. That was many years ago, but it turned out that the guy still remembered her and the three days they spent together touring all over California. Though he seemed to think they were friends, she thought he was shrewd with a hidden motive — not at all cute like he was in the past.

Knowing that they were in study hall now with the teacher answering individual questions rather than speed writing while talking, she agreed but once lunch started she used it as an excuse to get away, taking her bag with her to the cafeteria where she generally ate alone rather than hang out with superficial friends. None of them were like Nagisa or Karma or her colleagues at the bakery. She could get along with them, but there was no intimate feeling of actual connecting or caring about each other.

"Tch. Playing hard to get as always." Seo grumbled as he sat with the other four. "She should just be happy that a Virtuosos, top man, is talking to her and be mine already."

"Maybe your words aren't beautiful enough," Sakakibara Ren sparkled literally as he talked poetically, "Flowers only bloom in the best of spring, blossoming to the warm sun that fills the heart with beams."

"Hahaha, she really is different from the others~" Araki Teppei chuckled, "And prettier than the others as well."

They glanced around to see the ugly guys and girls, only a few of them appearing decent. There were still flaws though — black bagged eyes from lack of sleep, pimples, some white or gray hair from stress, cosmetic covered faces of girls to hide skin imperfections from late nights, obvious looks of worship towards them, and more. She however was natural — no perfume or cosmetic on her being while she still held a healthy body with smooth skin and vibrant silky hair. And she always she still managed to place in the Top 10 despite not going to cram schools and despite having a part time job.

Arai wasn't like any of them in that she didn't care about her grades or education as much. She was normal, giving them looks as if they were just like the others. She saw them for themselves, something they quite appreciated. And she was interesting with her aloof mysterious coolness and the challenge she posed; them being people that could get almost anything they wanted being rich, handsome, charismatic, and smart.

For that reason, Asano Gakushuu also found her interesting.

…

"...Why are we up here again?"

"Datte, you shouldn't be in the house all two weeks long — sure, you're some super robot that can do anything easily, but even robots need to exercise or they'll get all rusty!"

"Actually…" Karma paused for a moment to breathe, stubbornly not wanting to pant or sweat before the girl did as they ran through the forest with the big dog ahead of them. "Robots will rust faster if they exercise. And I did leave the house."

"Oh for how long? One hour per day?" She challenged before adding as she managed to still eat snacks while running, "And fine. Robots will grow older and dustier if they stay in one place for too long."

"Well, I'm not a robot so it's fine." He shot back before almost stumbling over a large tree root as the sky grew darker and he grew more tired. Still, he continued running as if nothing happened. She only knowingly smirked — he could sense it even if he couldn't see much anymore with the night's reign on Earth; the forever crescent moon, their only witness.

"Well, since you're not a robot, you have to exercise more!" She jumped over an especially large root, laughing as she dashed across the obstacles of bushes, tree trunks, tree roots, and little forest critters. The rocks were her stepping stones while the wind was her accelerator, "That's why you're in E as in End Class — you made the end yourself, not training any further!"

Finally, he huffed as he caught up to her; it was harder for him to adjust to the dark. After all, the girl really was like her namesake, a raccoon. And she knew the forests and mountains like the back of her hand, having ran all over it many times before with that accursed dog.

"Then you must be A as in Ass Class since you're pointing out something incriminatingly not true and rude." Standing to his full height after catching his breath from the slowed down pace, he said, "Besides, I don't need exercise. I'm E as in Extraordinary."

"Then I'm A as in Awesome." She twirled, shifting the air currents, "That doesn't mean anything. Point is…" She extended a hand towards him, grinning once again, "You're up here because you have to and I want you to. Got a problem? Or do you need help for the last meter to the clearing?"

He smirked as he walked past her and pushed back the large leaves blocking the large circular clearing that nurtured shibazakura and had cherry blossom petals meld in with the green grass. She walked beside him, gazing at their clearing which moonlight lit up to give a magical quality. She hummed,

"My two favorite flavors of Pocky. Green tea and strawberry."

Karma scoffed as he walked to the center, plopping down on the grass to stare at the multiple stars in the night sky, the stars mixing in with those midnight hues of purple and blue,

"It's too pink here. And leave it to you to ruin the sight by comparing it to sweets."

"I'll have you know that sweets are the food of God and anything should be honored to — Stop laughing!"

But he didn't as he felt high from the energy flowing in his veins from the long run and the nature around welcoming him back from his inclusive stay indoors. She sighed as she laid her head on the grass beside his though she laid in the other direction. The stars filled her vision — each of them so bright and beautiful. Each of them so insignificant yet powerful.

Even she had to stop eating at the sight that filled her mind.

"Karma-kun…?"

"Yeah?"

"...stop getting yourself suspended. Actually enjoy school and life — you can be with so many friends yet you always scare them away."

"..."

He made no promises. He no longer talked. They silently stared above at the lone yellow moon surrounded by multiple stars of weak lights; it was overcomed by the weak lights of individuals so close together that they glowed together into one powerful statement. In her opinion, the round yellow ball was eaten by the stars into the forever crescent it now was. While the invincible moon was beautiful and inspiring, this was humanity's hope that the impossible was possible… and unexplainable as they had yet to say what destroyed the moon. She smiled. There was still hope.

"Tomorrow…" She began, "Tomorrow… what kind of dessert do you want? I'll make something for you. For the end of your suspension."

"I'll take a wasabi cake then." He answered without hesitation.

"..." She paused and then shifted so that her head faced his, "Who are you going to give it to?"

"You don't need to know." He chuckled mischieviously.

"...right."

Or maybe there was really no hope in Karma ever changing his irrevocable ways. Still, for now, they laid in peace.

* * *

_Published April 22, 2014_

_Edited May 10, 2014_


	2. The Assassination Job

"Hey, Arai-chan. I want you to help me kill someone. You can do it, right~?"

Whatever she was expecting after his suspension wasn't this. She was stuck between emotions, not understanding how to react. Finally, she spoke,

"Wait, wait, wait, let me get this straight, Karma-kun." Nagisa sweatdropped as he watched the two in the back kitchen of Chiffon. Karma wasn't kidding at all apparently when he said that they were going to get something to eat on the way home after attempting to kill Korosensei with a jump off the cliff and a gun in hand. He wasn't kidding that he was going to kill Korosensei tomorrow or use the loose change he took from the alien's wallet as a contribution either. The girl with the same color hair and eyes as him except with much darker shades deadpanned; her long dark blue ponytail waved in wisps behind her with the movements of the egg beater she pointed at Karma's mirthful golden eyes. "You want me to help you kill someone."

Nagisa was a bit at disbelief himself that Karma would suggest such a thing to an ignorant normal student at Kunugigaoka Junior High School. Even if said person was Arai Koon… Actually… especially because it was her. After all, just a few days ago, it was him who was asking her how to use weapons properly. Karma merely beamed,

"Oh so you do get it! I was worried for a moment, but I'm proud of you, Arai-chan! You actually do have ears that work because that's exactly what I want you to help me do."

"Karma-kun…" She pinched her brows, "There are so many things wrong with that. And you just got out of suspension. Wasabi cake's fine, but murder? You're supposed to be smarter than that."

Nagisa quietly agreed. Karma was undeterred as he grinned, "Oh, come on—" He was about to touch her shoulder in a friendly manner, but she gave him the look to go wash his hands, which he did twice immediately to return in slinging his arm around her neck, continuing as if nothing happened, "Arai-chan~ It's not like I'm asking you to kill a real person. It's only a practice exercise! We're even using these amazing blue rubbery knives and BB pellets. No human will get hurt and everyone will learn — what a great P.E. activity, right~?"

Leave it to Karma to find a way to use those facts in mapping out his lies, Nagisa thought as he watched the lies and truths unfold together in a mergeable mess. Arai gazed at the knife and its flexibility before huffing, "And why me? If it's a P.E. activity, actually try to befriend your classmates and use them."

"Of course, of course, but I really thought to invite my very best friend from the main campus since it's a lenient project~ Besides, you know they can't do much when even Nagisa-kun himself asks you for help in the self defense~" Her eyes widened as she remembered that day. Was that what that was for? Nagisa wondered if he should speak up and tell the truth. Then again, the punishment was Memory Erasure Treatment. Were they even allowed to even say this much?

Karma continued smiling in a friendly but more than suspicious manner until finally it became genuine as she gave in if only to get the redhead away from her and… to pocket that extremely tempting amount of cash that he moved across the table. Arai at times could be a real greedy girl.

"Fine, fine, I'll help." She shook her head in exasperation, "So when's this P.E. lesson of yours?"

"It actually lasts for an indefinite amount of time, but I'd like to plan out and set up things today."

"...What kind of exercise was this again?"

"A P.E. training one! Like those in the army! A simulation to use all the skills a person learns in school to do something practical!"

"Like killing a person."

"Yup! Like killing a person!"

She sighed, shaking her head again but more or less giving him a generous amount of benefit of doubt, though it was more or less for her money. It seemed real at least — this 'killing' thing that they had to do— with Nagisa standing behind him, "Whatever. My shift ends in an hour and a half. Where do you want to meet?"

"Oh good! That's enough time to watch a movie while waiting!" Because God knows how much the two loved American movies. "Jya, come to my apartment — we'll be waiting for you, Arai-chan~!"

Nagisa finally commented once they left through the backdoor, greeting Arai's boss along the way, "Are you sure we were allowed to tell her that?"

"Hm? Are you worried about the Memory Erasure Treatment thing?" Karma waved it away, "No worries, Nagisa-kun, they just said that we weren't allowed to reveal the secret behind the Earth's crisis. Since when did I ever mention that?"

Karma really had a way with words, but Nagisa smiled. They might actually be able to do it tomorrow. After all, Arai could be called Karma's greatest rival a long once upon a time.

…

"You really didn't have to do all that, you know." Karma once again deadpanned when he felt sparkles behind his back once the movie finished.

"It was dirty." The girl simply said as she washed her hands and sat down in the now clean and tidy room. Everything seemed to sparkle from the cleansing tactics of their local raccoon. Taking the important looking notebook from Nagisa's hands, she flipped through the observations and weaknesses of this so called fake target; eyes narrowed in concentration. Nagisa was amazed by how focused she was despite what should be nonsensical words to a person who didn't know that Korosensei was really a real alien. Finally, she peered at the map of Class E's room. "This isn't good. We need the blueprints if we want to do quick modifications and all around traps. I'll head to the school archives."

"Yosh!" Karma pumped his fists in the air, grabbing six suitcases of weapons and a large container containing a healthy amount of bullets. He had gotten them from Karasuma once asking for more. Nagisa helped him carry them, asking,

"You don't… think that the target's weird?"

Arai shrugged, "Mach 20, sticky liquid, shedding tactics — who knows how good technology has become and how far science has advanced now, even if you had all the connections in the world. After all, the target's from the army which should be from innovating America since Japan doesn't have a military, right?" Her dark blue eyes narrowed slightly, "Unless you're lying…"

"Of course not!" Karma butted in with his grin; his golden eyes edging Nagisa to say the same loudly. When she went ahead to get the blueprints, planning to meet them at the old school building with flashlights, Karma ruffled his blue hair, "Come on, Nagisa-kun~ I already donated a lot of money to her for the assassination."

"You mean, Korosensei's spare change…"

"Oh, Nagisa-kun. Money always changes hands. Like how it became mine after and then hers~"

"Right…" Nagisa felt a bit bad for lying to the girl. Excited for the plan though, he continued working and finally after a long night out, the three departed from the old school building area with Nagisa sending a text message to everyone to avoid stepping on certain areas.

…

"So there should be a trap in those areas?" Sugino Tomohito indiscreetly examined the wooden boards in their classroom, making Kataoka Megu whack him,

"Stop staring. Don't ruin Nagisa-kun's traps before they even get tested."

"He'll probably already notice somehow and just step on them purposely though." Isogai Yuuma sighed, "Korosensei's always like that."

"Where'd you even get the idea of traps, Nagisa-kun?" Kayano Kaede asked curiously, trying to spot them, "I can't see any difference."

Nagisa sweat-dropped, "It was sort of Karma-kun's idea." Hiring her that is. "I just helped with setting them up. Anyways, don't step in the areas mentioned in the text message…" Remembering the things they placed in there, he asserted more seriously, "You wouldn't want to."

Terasaka stopped mid-stomp on a floorboard; the guy was about to blatantly sabotage the plan until he heard Karma's name. Nothing that the redhead did could ever be good… or safe. So they waited with Karma humming at his seat with an anti-sensei knife openly in hand and Nagisa clenching an anti-sensei handgun behind his desk. Finally, Korosensei arrived with Karasuma trailing behind, the alien blinking at the sight of the redhead in the back outright waving his blue knife as if waving bye,

"Ah~! You're really going to try assassinating me today, Karma-kun~?" His head turned into green and white stripes as he grinned widely, "Too soft, too soft. There's no way you can ever reach me with that puny knife of yours — NUAH!"

Karasuma immediately jumped back into the hallway when the yellow octopus fell backwards; his sense of balance falling with a tentacle melting upon touching a floorboard. While falling, Korosensei touched both sides of the open doorway, causing the door frame to collapse in, revealing large distinct blue anti-sensei knives without handles that were about to stab him from above; his weight causing a floorboard with another similar anti-sensei knife attached to launch up like a see saw. With his speed, however, he quickly regained balance and darted forward, jumping over the wooden floorboard that melted a tentacle only to feel another one melt and see the ceiling suddenly rain anti-sensei BB pellets.

Korosensei panicked, especially at the heavy flood of those accursed bullets and Nagisa immediately took out his gun to shoot the wooden lectern, causing knives to stab out of the wooden thing, taking away two tentacles as Korosensei slowly reacted from having to dodge the thick mass of things from above. The blue haired boy continued shooting at the yellow tentacles extremely close to the ground so that they made heavy noises when contacting wood; an anti-sensei knife stabbed up immediately from the cracks of each wooden floorboard Nagisa aimed at. Korosensei started looking at the ground with the rain over to watch where Nagisa was shooting and the anti-sensei knife was going to pop up, noticing a bit too late as Karma took advantage of his concentration of below and the loud noise from above to stab from the front with his knife, having casually walked up to the front of the class.

Being an alien that could move at Mach 20 though, the teacher was able to grab his arm before the knife reached. Korosensei sighing in relief when Nagisa's gun ran out of ammunition and the rain of bullets ended. Then, the smile stretched,

"That was a very nice assassination attempt, Karma-kun, Nagisa-kun. You two really scared me—"

"Bang." Karma said as he shot the gun with a grin. Korosensei narrowly dodged it, continuing his words after a pause of surprise,

"Korosensei's very pleased that you spent a lot of time thinking about this~! Karma-kun showed me a knife first so that I would assume that you were charging with one when it was really a gun. You two must have spent the night making anti-sensei powder and spreading it on the floorboards where I was most likely to step on. As well as breaking the door frame and putting it together with anti-sensei shards in between cracks so that it would fall once I put pressure on it as I fall~!" Korosensei gazed down to the now inactive wooden floorboards. "I'm still figuring out Nagisa-kun's gun and knife trap trick though. Hmmm…"

While he was talking, Karma had casually shot thrice at point blank, watching coolly as Korosensei dodged it before stopping. Korosensei looked at him questioningly as he still had two more bullets to go. The redhead though grinned, moving his gun up at Korosensei's head,

"You talk too much, Korosensei. Thanks for the noise pollution." The meaning of the words escaped the yellow alien when large cracking noises filled their ears.

The wooden planks beneath the chalkboard of the wall behind Korosensei fell forward, crashing into Korosensei's tentacles and drawing blood with the anti-sensei shards on top of them. A girl dashed forward, catching Korosensei's attention and blinding his eyes with the haphazardly flashing white light of her cellphone and stabbing into another before Korosensei caught his wits. He had almost no where to escape to however as anti-sensei powder smoked up like dust clouds before him and he noticed way too late the nearly invisibly thin wires coated with the blue powder around him; a fraction of the BB pellets having brought them down from the ceiling to trap him. Karma shot the two bullets immediately after speaking; already pointing point blank at his head.

The class gaped at the action that played before their eyes. Karasuma especially as he watched from the broken doorway where the same wires blocked the exit, having been brought down by the knives. There was no way Korosensei could have dodged that with his limited range of possible movements and the anti-sensei smoke melting his already maimed body, decreasing his mobility.

But then a flash of bright light blinded their eyes and Korosensei disappeared once the powder cleared, settling on the ground. The girl frowned as she glanced around and then stuck her hand out through the barrier of invisible wires; Nagisa noticed and tossed his notebook to her and she sped-read it in a few seconds, nodding,

"Yup. That ability's not in here." Glancing behind her where she came from, she saw her wires, "And I blocked that exit… You failed to tell me something, Karma-kun, Nagisa-kun, because I don't see the target. His corpse should be here even if corroded."

Karma frowned as he moved the sharp wires carefully by pushing their respective bullets to the side with a shoe. He peered around like a detective,

"Yup. I don't see him. My bad; he must have had another ability. The target had a stupidly useful body despite being one of those things—" He vaguely ended, making her sigh as she reminded him,

"You told me that he was some sort of biological robotic creation from the American army that was shipped over to your class as an experiment to see how well it fared in combat since your class had nothing to do or future anyways being in Class E and the Americans wanted to help the future special defense force recruits of Japan to grow stronger."

"That." Karma grinned while the class sweatdropped. To make it better, it was her herself who developed half of that bs. He patted her amiably, "Ah, whatever, that was the best we ever did so wherever he had gone, he'll come back and I'll tell you for the next time. After all, I did pay you already~ You're not going to abandon a job, are you?" He teased challengingly.

She sighed, slicing through the wires behind her with a real knife and retrieving her bags — a black school bag with a raccoon figurine charm attached to the strap and the cloth bag of sweets she always had. Her face was of utter disappointment as she unwrapped a green lollipop to stick in her mouth, moving her hands down to pat off the dust and harmless powder. She wore the proper Kunugigaoka Junior High Uniform without the jacket and vest.

"Kinda disappointing. All that work for nothing…" She gazed at the tentacles, grabbing three, "Hmmm, the blood's done pretty well for a dummy target. I'll go see if there's any other weaknesses you missed then, my little inefficient clients~" She waved, heading towards the doorway. "See you later…"

"Ah, bye, Arai-chan!" Nagisa shouted while Karma twitched a bit at being called inefficient, muttering a few things but unable to deny it without giving away Korosensei's catastrophic, future world-destroying alien status.

The girl sliced the wires of the doorway, walking past Karasuma and offering the guy a bow, "I apologize about mangling up the classroom, sensei. I'll clean up the mess after school so please use the next door classroom I cleaned beforehand."

"Ah, yeah.," Karasuma nodded after gazing at the girl in mild shock as she left with a smile, giving him a pat,

"Must be troublesome to have Karma-kun in your class." She indirectly but cheekily teased the redhead, "Best of luck teaching Kunugigaoka's misfits, but don't give up on them, sensei~"

And she left with a tall stride despite her rather short stature. But once she turned around the corner, she fell to her knees in a huff. Her heart pounded loudly in excitement and she was afraid she couldn't hold it in anymore. She wanted to cause more mischief, trouble, chaos — she wanted to do evil, but she couldn't. She was a student and she was a morally good citizen.

"I almost killed something…" A silly grin marked her face and then, she remembered the money in her wallet, "...but I failed. At my one job too." Arai sighed, slowly getting up again, "I can't believe it. It's been a long time since I failed at something I was paid to do."

Ironically, Karma was the last failure.

…

"WHOA! You almost killed him, Nagisa, Karma!" The class shouted with varying suffixes attached to the two boys' name. They roared and cheered, rising up from their seats to run to the front where many tentacles laid around among the blue powder of anti-sensei material. It was exciting like seeing a movie live — the plan, the tension, the actions that all counted towards the final goal of killing the unkillable. Okuda Manami beamed as she took a tentacle as well, quietly such that no one noticed among the ruckus. It was just so inspiring to her, especially after watching so many futile useless attempts. She too was going to try and see what information she could find out.

Sugino slung an arm around his friend, "Who was she?! That was amazing — especially when she just crashed out of nowhere and slashed his tentacles as if they weren't anything!"

Kayano Kaede gazed at the hole, "How did that even work? And what was Nagisa-kun's trick in the end anyways?" She stopped when Nagisa placed a hand on her to prevent her from walking into the barely visible wires. "Where did these wires come from anyways?"

"Shiota-kun shot the floorboards to inform the girl who was underneath where Korosensei was. His target wasn't the tentacles, but mere information." Karasuma spoke as he too walked into the classroom, gazing at the wire barrier with interest, "Then after twelve bullets and while Korosensei was talking, she snuck into the classroom behind this one and waited for Akabane-kun to say the keyword which I'm assuming was 'noise pollution'." Karma nodded. "She used the flashing white light to blind and attract Korosensei's attention while you already had the gun on his head, ready to shoot right after you said the keyword. She blocked off all exits and limited his paths so that he couldn't escape with wires tied to BB pellets that had holes drilled in them."

He held one up to see that it was like a necklace bead with the large hole inside the small sphere. "The knives that attacked him in the doorway were the same. These are coated with anti-sensei powder and are almost microscopic to increase surprise especially when the target was panicking from the assault of a stranger he did not know and a situation never encountered before." Finally, he gazed up at the ceiling and then lifted the podium to see that it was carved out, connected to the old building's underground. "You three must have spent the whole night modifying your surroundings to suit your needs for the plan as well as use a neutralizing odor to cover up your and your traps' scent. And a heavy weight animal, perhaps a dog, scattered the bullets and later the powder on signal through the cracks in the ceiling."

"Eh?! Really?! There's a dog on the ceiling?!" Kurahashi Hinano, the class biologist, sparkled as she pointed up. Karma rubbed his head impressed and feeling a bit humbled from the spot on deduction. He called out,

"Oi! Inuou! Your owner already left so go ahead and go!"

"Ruff!" A dog barked before there were trods on the ceiling as a four-legged animal ran and jumped off, landing on the ground near their window. The German Shepherd with a camouflage-pattern bandana tied around his neck gazed at the two he knew before leaving with a dash into the forest.

"So cute!" Kurahashi shouted at the handsome canine.

"I'm impressed that you figured it all out, Karasuma-sensei." Karma complimented before he gazed around again, "Though I wonder how Korosensei escaped that."

"Who was she?" The man asked as he too looked for clues for the next assassination attempt to block off all possible flaws. For the safety of the kids, he also carefully undid the sharp wires. "Just making sure, you didn't tell her anything about the crisis or anything, right?" Karma arched a brow,

"A crisis? With her thinking that Korosensei came from the army of the nation protecting us by treaty from World War II?"

That was a good point as Karasuma also heard (and deadpanned) at her summary of things that the redhead had told her, which was all nonsensical — and amazing to actually know that she believed and did the things she did while believing those obvious outlandish lies. Then again, he also heard something about a job so the money was probably the deciding factor. Even if Karma told her about the crisis though, the girl was too useful to pass up if she was a student at this school and could actually cause that much damage to the alien when no one else had before — even at the World Conference. So he was right. It was only in this classroom where the alien could be killed.

Nagisa began, "Her name is—"

"Arai Koon from Class A! She's the one that makes it into the Top 10 in exam rankings and works at Chiffon part time." Maehara Hiroto shouted, snapping his fingers before grinning, "I'm right, right?"

They actually weren't surprised with how he was a gigolo who knew most of the girls in the school. Kataoka Megu blinked in surprise,

"From Class A? Someone from the main building actually came to this one? Knows you two Class E students?"

It wouldn't have been amazing if it weren't for the fact that the school held Class E as failures, outcasts, and the lowest of the low. Even Karasuma had noticed the discrimination on his first day in the main school building. Nagisa beamed,

"Yeah! Arai-chan doesn't care about that sort of stuff—"

"Because we bribed her." Karma interrupted; Nagisa continued as if the redhead said nothing,

"—and we've been friends since the later half of first year. Her brother was in the army and she takes jobs from anyone as long as they have enough money so Karma-kun thought to include her in this attempt. She made most of the plans and designed all of the traps, using the building blueprints."

Karasuma's eyes lit up, "Do you still have the blueprints?"

"Ah, yeah." Nagisa took the folded paper out of his notebook, handing it to the defense agent as he explained,

"Thanks, Shiota-kun. I've been looking for these. Where did she get them?"

"School archives." Karma answered before giving up on his search. How did that flash of bright light that covered the classroom appear anyways? "The classroom attempt won't work anymore. We lost our surprise and still don't know how he escaped. He won't panic next time he sees her."

Karasuma nodded in thought, having remembered the second weakness in Nagisa's book of observations. Korosensei was surprisingly quick to panic, which was probably the main reason why the surprise assault worked so well. It wouldn't anymore.

And who knows if the girl could even come up with another plan just as great or greater than this already well thought out one. Especially without more information or observations of the target. Her brother must have been a great army soldier for she was young yet could still create a working battle strategy from a mere briefing. It was impressive. Was this the difference between Class A and Class E?

…

Korosensei rolled with the downhill slump of dirt below the old school building. He chuckled amiably, having overheard the conversation above. Arai Koon, was it? And he recognized her as the baker in the bakery with delicious products. So this was a Class A student — and to think that Karma actually used his money to hire someone to kill him though. His poor money was gone and probably all spent…

He sighed as the orange sphere he was in slowly turned by the laws of physics. He didn't know that he could compress his body into an impenetrable crystal like this, but now he knew. Now, he couldn't move for probably 24 hours. But he now learned his lesson because…

"Sensei's do not only teach; they learn everyday too to be able to keep teaching their students new things."

* * *

_Published April 25, 2014_

_Edited May 10, 2014_


End file.
